I spilled spot remover on my dog. Needless to say he received a bath that night.

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Why did Nico Bellec not shoot that one guy? Just joking, this is Grand Theft Auto 4 dummy.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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I got 99 problems but the ability to count ain't one

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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A hooker walks into a hospital. Only to find out that she has aids.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A dead panda.

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Mum says therirs ups in life... I have the Downs

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What do you call a sheep? something to have sex with.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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Why was the boy drinking toilet water? Because he was receiving a violent swirly. He then went home and killed himself.

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poopy is poopy

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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What do you call a black guy who gives out change? A cashier.

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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