How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

What's red and green and goes 100mph? A frog in a vehicle on the Autobahn.

Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

how do you get a black guy out of a tree? fried chicken.

what did the slave say to the slave owner i like your car

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? A good example of friendly competition.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Enough.

The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

I am dyslexic

What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Q: what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A: We're both lawyers!

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

a man checks his mypsace

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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