Q: What did the homeless man say when he was mauled by a bear? A: Ouch.

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A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

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Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

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Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but so

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and an astronaut? One walks on the moon and the other has sex with little boys.

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are u black unlucky

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how do you break up with your girlfriend? talk about their race.

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My mom

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What do you call a man with a diploma? A high school graduate.

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Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

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What do you get when you breed a dog and a cat together? A call from the RSPCA.

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How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With floss.

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Why couldn't the fan turn on? Because it was broken.

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why did matt die? He had cancer

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How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

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like if your cool

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What boy with no arms get on his birthday? Lego.

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An Asian couple walks into a bar, orders a few drinks, pays, and leaves

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An Asian man walks into a bar and ask the Barman for a beer, the Barman is racist and therefore tells the Asian man to leave his pub. The man goes home and drowns his children in the bath and pushes his wife down the stairs, he is found out by the police and is given a life sentence in jail. 5 years later the Barman kills someone in a bar fight and is also sent to jail for life. The Barman meats the Asian man in prison and they settle there differences with a handshake. Two days later the Barman was stabbed in the neck.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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