Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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reggin... its N I GG E R backwards

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Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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Q: What would happen if you threw a red brick into the black sea? A: It would get wet.

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Why did Timmy lose the race? He had no legs

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What sport do all black people like? This is impossible to answer because not all black people like the same sport.

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Q: What said the first bagel to the other? A: Nothing! Bagels can't talk!

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John, Where are you John: Here! Where's here? John: nevermind

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What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

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Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

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What has a bomb straped to itself and has wheels? Me. I lied about the wheels.

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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? Quite obviously, still quizzical, being that tests are just longer, harder quizzes.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but his stomach was not big enough to finish. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free meal.

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What's black and has the texture of tar? Molasses

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Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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