what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? A black man eating fried chicken.

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

A muslim guy walks into a bar and orders a water as he isnt allowed to drink alcohol

Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

Why is yellow afraid of 7? Impossible. Colors have no sense of fear.

Ross Tumilty is gay 8===D

what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

A man walked into a bar. He has been in a coma for six weeks now.

why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

Whats not funny and no one wants to waste the time to reading it? This joke

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

Q: Why did the baby cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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