why cant monkeys swim? cause they dont have staberlizers.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the priest circumcised? He had a very painful urinary tract infection

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the boy with one arm have no friends? He was a cereal killer from Ireland.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

So this fat guy farts. It smells.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did one Dentist say to the other? You are fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Farlingaye high school :L what a crap place!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

96

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock, knock. Who's There? The Fire Department...

thumb_up thumb_down -12

You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars. You both have the same amount of money.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

God

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -12

it's weird how Jesus came out of the cave on the same day as Easter

thumb_up thumb_down -12

3 guys walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

It's long!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

If your riding a jet ski and the wheels fall off Then how many pancakes does it take to Cover a dog house Purple because ice cream doesn't have Any bones

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops