I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

I can be considerate if like someone is burning to death and I was the one considerate enough to lit them on fire... Wait no, I am considerate towards my friends (which are all ladies, all men besides me are obstacles and nothing else) AAAAND my logic processor broke down. Anyway, please do me the honors, take the last message.

A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

Your mother is such a whore that she engages regularly in acts of consensual but unprotected sex with various gentlemen.

What do you get if you cross a horse with a cow? A horse and a cow.

KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? i don't know, he hasn't unwrapped it yet

When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? The woman wasnt premature and abused from an early age.

Whats the difference between cake and dead babies? Cakes make people happy while dead babies are a sad and disturbing sight to see.

Your mom goes to college. Actually, she graduated a while back!

What does a black guy do to a white girl when the lights go off and there's a bed in the room? They go to sleep so they can have enough energy to work their two jobs and provide for their family after they've been evicted from their home.

What happens when a llama falls off a cliff? It dies.

Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

Q: How much jizz does a gay guy have? A: a butt load

Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

What do you call a black man? Black

EVAN RAMSEY -CAD CLASS!

How do you kill a innocent young boy walking from school? I don't know but do you want to enjoy a refreshing beverage of creaming soda?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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