How does a black man cut his hair? At a hairdresser

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the the frog cross the road? because he was on the chickens back

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the main difference between dogs and children? When children reach their teen years they grow up and leave home. When dogs reach their teen years they die of old age.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the frog cross the street? To make babies

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Yo momma is so stupid that the only test she passed was the mental retardation test.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what do a carrot and an elephant have in common? theyre both orange except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did they call the woman crazy? because she drowned her children in a lake.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the skeleton stay home from the party He was buried in a coffin underground and, as a matter of fact, wasn't actually invited

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between a duck?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An overzealous adventurer takes a trip to the Congo in Central Africa. While exploring the dense jungles, he accidentally drinks water that is contaminated with a very rare virus. He lives through the pain of the virus for many years. About 10 years after his trip to Africa, researchers discover a cure for the adventurer's virus. He goes to the clinic to get his shot to kill the virus. Exhilarated, the now cured adventurer runs out of the clinic but fails to look both ways while crossing the street and gets hit by and ambulance and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, speaking to a bird would have been considered highly irregular, bordering on insane. He left the bird alone, until the time came to slaughter the bird and take it's nutritious meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the Monkey Fall out of the tree? ..It was dead..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops