What do you call a group of black people? A group, you racist.

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What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

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No, Trinidad.

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Why did the girl cross the road? Doesn't matter she got hit by a bus.

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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Guy #1: Knock knock Guy #2: Whos there? Guy #1: Interrupting murderer Guy #2: Interrupting murd.... Guy #1: STAB!!!

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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The real reason you go to college is.... To learn more about what you want to do in life.

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Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

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Yo mom so fat that even Torres won't miss her

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what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

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what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

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Q: What's long and gray and kills people? A: A gas pipe.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

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Two english guys meet at work

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2 guys get into a fight over a girl.....the girl walks out

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How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

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Ill do a lot more than just try you, anyways, technically I learned to play the piano as a kid, but now I play on a small cheap keyboard (the musical kind) and sincerely, I kinda suck at it now, my abusive parents expected perfection beat the shit out of me blahblahblah, thats really all of it, trauma. My senses, well, when I was a kid I was terrified of gravity (one of the rarest fears in the world) because I had no idea I was consciously shifting things myself. So lets say... If I somehow end up hanging upside down, I just shift it, so my brain believes I am not and I experience no discomfort, there is a lot more to it, ill tell you, damn nose wont stop bleeding and my waifu got a bit scared, she got some bad bronchitis and she still has not recovered a 100 percent, but its just the cough now though... Lets just say that my ability to balance, is about 300-500 percent higher than any regular human, and that I can stand on one leg enough to beat the guiness record book 50 times... ...IIIIF I was in good shape, which I am not.

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What is black and blue and really is not in the mood for sex? The new girl at the women's shelter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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