Why did the black girl and white guy have sex? Because they were both sexually attracted to each other.

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Three blonds walk into a bar ... They said ouch!

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knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

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A lobster walks up to an octopus. What does he say? Nothing. Lobsters cannot talk.

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what did one pedophile say to the other at the playground? DIBZ!!!

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What does Kim Kardashian and a Navy Vessel have in common? They are both full of seamen!

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? POPCORN

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A man walks into a bar He is STD positive.

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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why navy seals ? they shot osoma bin laden in the face...... multiple times

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A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

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Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

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How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? A: Pick him up and suck on his wang!

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What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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one time there was a fukc then it taked a shat potated pancocks cancer is fuCk 18 why did the cock cross the choad? fUcK

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Why did the zuccini fly? I was in an acid trip.

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Nickelback

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Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

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What did the unicorn say to the man.\ Nothing unicorns don't exist

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who wants to hear a joke about the broken pencil? to late, its sharpened

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How much wood could a wood chuck, chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? They don't ACTUALLY eat or throw wood. Instead, they eat grasses and insects and pretty much everything else at ground level they can get their hands on. But they can, apparently, CHEW wood, and that's where the idea for this study came in. The authors decided to use the word "chuck" to mean "chew" (I suppose because upchucking is the opposite?), and wanted to see how much wood a woodchuck could chuck. They obtained 12 woodchucks (by "various means" that are not described, I picture some middle aged guy in a suit trying to stalk one), and food deprived them to ensure they would eat the wood. Then, they fed each woodchuck a 2x4 (yes) and watched how fast they ate it. All the woodchucks ate the wood, none actively attempted to toss it, and none upchucked. They could, apparently digest the wood pretty well, and consumed it at a rate of 361.9237001 cubic centimeteres per animals per day (no error bars, and the food deprivation was nuts, 12 days, leading me to think they didn't REALLY...). They note that, while none of the woodchucks attempted to throw the wood, they probably would have, had they been capable. So the next time someone asks you, how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? You answer is clear! He'd chuck 361.9237001 cubic centrimeters of wood per day, which is the wood that a woodchuck COULD chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

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Obama

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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