How do you get a blond to fall over? Shoot her with a shotgun.

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What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

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If Chuck Norris had five dollars and YOU had five dollars, he could still punch you in the face for free and get ten dollars out of it.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't blue, They're fucking violet, And I hate you.

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Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says what do you want? the duck says nothing cause ducks can't talk

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How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

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rosie o'donald goes on a diet

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3 men walk into a bar. they all take a cab home to keep from having an accident due to their intoxication.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

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Wats rong with yo leg.....

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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Farmers are outstanding in their fields

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Why did Daphie die? I stabbed her 487 times.

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A women in the kitchen.

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whats worse than 8 babies nailed to a tree? nothing but oca mom is going to be pissed that her kids are nailed to a tree

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what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

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Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

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The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

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2 guys are on a scaffolding. One of them says to the other "If you fall from here, theres a high probability you will die"

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How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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