What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you? Run, 'cause she's got a grenade in her mouth!

roses are blue, violets are red, im colorblind

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "...no..?"

what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

What do Jews and Sloths have in common? They are both Mammals.

You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

Why did the black man say "I been done did that?" He was speaking ebonics.

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke in anti-joke? The Holocaust.

A racist guy walks into a bar. Gets drunk, and cracks jokes. Then proceeds to get the shit kicked out of him.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a terrorist.

Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

Why did the chicken cross the road? The parking lot was across the street from KFC.

what do you tell a woman with one black eye? "sorry about that wild ball, you played a fantastic softball game otherwise"

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

Person 1: Can I ask you a question? Person 2: You just did.

Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

Q: Whats blue and fluffy A: Blue fluff Q: Whats brown and fluffy . A: The bear that killed my parents.

Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

Nock nock Whos there? The mailman, I have a package for you. Thank you.

Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

What's worse than losing one of your socks? Being jewish during the holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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