Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue shotgun How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose and shoot it with a blue shotgun.

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

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Why did the fat guy sit on another guy? They were in a wrestling match.

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Lets go Yankees

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when life throws you lemons your an idiot because it wont

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Why can't a black guy be the King of England? He's not in line for it.

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Whats that cool sound it makes when you thumbs a comment?

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a kangaroo walks in to a bar and sits down. Kangaroo's live in Auustralia

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Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

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What did the blind football player say to his coach? I cant see

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To be eaten.

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Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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How can you tell if a duck is sleeping? Look at its eyes.

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How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

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An Indian child is born with three arms. After being ridiculed his whole life he kills himself at age 19.

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Whats green, has 4 legs and falls out a tree? A pool table

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what do mexicans like most. icecubes

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your mum

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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The last time Jesse saw his **** was the day..........oh wait it's never happened

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Wow, so it is true, you are here the entire fucking time aren't you bitch? You and all "six billion of your followers of the dark", listen asshead, one thing is people asking ME when I FUCKING SIGN BOOKS (which does not happen all that FUCKING OFTEN!) Why I lead a fucking cult of sorts. Another one is having your goons stab me in the FUCKING EYE, and going "Oh I am like so sorry, please let me be the gayest I can be" People assaulting me because I use the "Moralman identity" IT IS MINE! My real FUCKING NAME IS NERO! I DON'T GO AROUND STEALING NOBODY`S SHIT!

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do not read this(this is intended to be read)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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