What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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A worm slowly crawled through the ground, only to be eaten by an incoming bird.

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What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What is 2 + 2? 3 LOL

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What do you call it when a cave man pisses himself running from a t-rex? Historically incorrect.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

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the WNBA

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There was a man workin at the supermarket, when a cow with a hat entered. He realized that it couldn't be really happening and had to be a dream. Effectively: he was dreaming. Actually, he was in jail, and his execution was scheduled for that day.

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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A man hits a woman while driving. Whose fault is it? The mas. He was out drinking that night and shouldn't have gotten in his car in the first place.

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Why was the accountant sad? He just watched his wife have consensual sex with another man.

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What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

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How do you fit a homosexual man into a small card board box? You cut him into pieces.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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Why was the first name of the boy 'Price'? His parents were Hamsters.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure but my guess is that there was some logical reasoning behind the action.

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Little Davie was a kid with no arms and legs and one day his friends Came to his house and knocked on the door and asked for little Davie And asked if he wanted to come play baseball..Little Davie replied "I'd Love to but I have no arms or legs" his friends say we know that..We were Just needing a second base..

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My children are huge mistakes.

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Roses are red Bacon is too Rhyming is hard bacon

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops