... i forgot the joke :p

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What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

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Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

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Its December 21, 2012. You are still alive.

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I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

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What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

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why was the girl sleeping on the ground? because she was dead

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A blind man walks into a bar. He didn't know there was a step and tripped loudly. Other bargoers saw this and helped him up, he was given a beer on the house.

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What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

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Q: Why are lizards broke? A: Because they run around the desert with no money.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Provolone

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Yo' momma is like a hardware store, 25 cents for a screw!

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What does a bartender say to almost all of his customers? May I please see your I.D.

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Whats worse than a clock with no hands? Your mom with cancer.

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Violets are Blue, Roses are Red, skip the bull$%!#, and give me head

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Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

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give one word to discribe a man who has been in combat for 10 years and finnaly gets home to his family and he chokes and dies on piece of brockly. Irony

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A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

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What is worse then a worm in your apple? 2 worms in your apple.

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Why do Eskimos build igloos? Because it is the most practical form of habitation for their climate zone, lifestyle, and availability of materials.

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A guy says a joke. It was not funny

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What a gay guy get on his IQ test? 69

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Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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