your mother hates you

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

Why did the lizard cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

AIDS

If a prisoner got one visitor who would he ask to see An Eskimo

I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

What do you call one lawyer shot dead in the street? Ghandi.

Guess what? What? Idk. I just wanted to make u excited.

Me: Why are red onions actually purple..? Dad: I don't know Sister: *sarcastic* Well, Why is it rainy in London? Me: ....Because that's the weather pattern.

I WILL DESTROY ISIS

what did one tree say to the other? move over

Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

Q: What is a man? A: A miserable little pile of secrets.

GOODJESUSLORDALMIGHTY dis boy myyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy i can't even................ fhrejhklgfjgtedlfcgrbh http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=231&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=6-GniQ6ct-j0HM:&imgrefurl=http://katiespilling.blogspot.com/&docid=6oY2cEt2v

7

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

Do you know what will hurt? Getting hurt.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom went to the doctor and found out she has cancer, so when she told me, I was eccentric. That tree is green.

If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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