If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he got hit by a car. Follow forever.art7 on Insta.

have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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