Whats worse than spilling the milk? Getting raped by the easter bunny.

A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

Whet doesn't kill you, probably will next time.

What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

What do you call a kid with one leg and an eye patch? Names

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

A thief stole a calendar. Later, feeling guilty, he returned it to its owner, admitted his misconduct, and went to a local minimart to purchase his own.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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