Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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Why did the man fall over? He was blind.

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what's an advantage of breaking every bone in your body? nothing, you're screwed.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because it is a horse and doesn't understand English. It gets confused about it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, upending a few tables along the way.

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You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

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Why did the clown get in the car? Because he can.

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Screw it you write the joke.

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

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Why did Batman brush his teeth? So he wouldn't get bat breath

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Stolen.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So it could cause traffic accidents.

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What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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Yo momma's so poor, she needs to work 2 jobs to support her family.

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops