How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

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Tina: Mom, would you love me if I was straight Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was gay Mom: Yes Tina: Would you love me if I was Bi Mom: No Tina: Why not Mom: Because that's selfish!

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Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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An irishman walks into a bar and stays there until he goes home.

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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Well, you need to develop a particular mindset, and while scienTITS claim that its not logical so it does not work... Well, SUGAR, thing is that the mind and emotions, cannot be explained logically either. Let me expand your mind (if I have not already) A astronomer meets up with a brain surgeon, the Astronomer says to the brain surgeon: I do not believe in god. Why? says the brain surgeon. Because I have studied most of the outer space and never found seen any trace of God.

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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A moose walks into a grocery store. He goes over to a cashier and says, "On what aisle are the potates?" The cashier replies, "Aisle 4." The moose went to aisle 4 AND THERE WERE NO POTATOES!

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Would you spit or swallow? Well, in circumstances when i am eating or drinking, i would swallow. Although if i had something disgusting in my mouth i would spit

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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