what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

What's worse than finding a band aid in your Crock-pot? Finding a Crock-pot in your band aid.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

knock knock - whos there whos there -"im confused" try it on someone

what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...