Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

Knock knock. Who is there? The FBI. They have a warrant for your arrest.

Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

Whats worst than finding half a worm in your apple? Getting rapped by a giant scorpian

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

What's the difference between Neal Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neal Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON, while Michael Jackson enjoyed touching young boys.

Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

no really what are ur names?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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