why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

Why can't february march Because april may

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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