What happened to the lady? She queefed.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

whats brown and sticky? Doody

knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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