A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

a. why? b. because I wanted

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

What do an airplane and a grape have in common? They both have wings, except the grape.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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