Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He never did because he's in KFC

why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Apple hates Blackberry.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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