How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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Q: What did the boy do when his mom asked him to put away his clothes? A: Yes. PS: If that wasn't funny to you, then go f**k off. You clearly don't have any sence of humor and you should see someone about that, like a mental health doctor.

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

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You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

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what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

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haha black people :D

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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