Allah walked into AK Bar

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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yo momma so fat... she went on a calorie controlled diet and lost 3 stone, she's a really nice lady too.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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That's not mine! it's bigger and blacker! ...where have i heard this before?

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What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

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What do you call a Muslim pilot? An accident waiting to happen

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One, two, three, four and five

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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