Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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antonio has a penis head.lol

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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And you honored it I see :P

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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