If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was died...

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

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White men's rights

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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So Nero, do we tell people your comments are all containing codes and stuff so we can stay in touch?

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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