Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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Justin Bieber

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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How do you make an egg laugh? That is an irrational question eggs are inanimate object and are unable to laugh

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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Why did little Sammy die of boredom? The WNBA was on

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I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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