why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. The one stopped because the other fell off the bead and died.

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I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

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What happens when you give a guinea pig a cherry? He turns into satan.

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Old Macdonald had dyslexia IE IE O

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YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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