What do you get when you put two landsharks together? Three landsharks.

What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

Women outside of the kitchen.

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

What did the Republican say after he got off the ferris wheel but before he went on the roller coaster? "Boy, that ferris wheel sure was fun! Now I will ride the roller coaster!"

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

why cant black people swim? I dont know but they killed my family

Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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