What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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