knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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whats the difference between a bird and a turtle? they can both fly but the turtle cant

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what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Tom and Ralph are In a verbal scuffle. Tom: your adopted ralf! Ralph: yes! Now I have lesser chance of high blood pressure!

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

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What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

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Two nerds walk into a bar. The effects of alcohol do not discriminate based upon the social status of said consumer.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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Q: How do you starve a Black family? A: By not giving any Food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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