Twelve people are in a plane. One of them says: "Man, we really are not so many in this plane" Another one replies: "It's because it's a 12 seats plane." Another says: "Do 12 seats planes even exist?" Another one answers: "Of course they do." Another person says: "Guys, are we even flying?" Someone says: "I don't know" Another says: "Yes, we're flying, look out the window." Another says: "I have cancer." Someone reacts: "Oh, I'm really sorry for you" Another: "Yes, me too" Someone adds: "It's really terrible" Another says: "Has science made any progress recently?" The plane crashes.

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What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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roses are red poo is poo

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

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Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops