Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

Q. What do you call a blonde in a library? A. Lost.

why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

Why is facebook ruining all of the world's social skills? Because Mark Zuckerberg has Asperger's.

I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

Do you play piano? No

Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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