Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the head repeatedly

Q: Did you hear about the fire at the circus? A: It was in tents!

a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

God is real.

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

What is the difference between a black baby and a tractor? A tractor is heavy and a baby is not

What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

Holocaust. I was too lazy to make it complete, so enjoy the punchline and comment your own question. It will probably be funnier.

Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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