Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's green and runs through the forest? - A pack of cucumbers. What's wrong with that? - Cucumbers aren't pack animals.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops