What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

roses are red violets are puffy i am a donkey i ate some water

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Henry threw it well.

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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