What's the difference between Little Billy and Ice Cream? People like Ice Cream.

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What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Hook a finger from each hand in your mouth, now pull so your lips are tight and try to say "I was born on a pirate ship" I'm sorry, I can hardly understand you.

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What's black and white and red all over and can't go through a revolving door? A nun with a spear stuck in her head.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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why did the woman walk into the kitchen? i don't know, but the better question is why she left in the first place.

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops