"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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Mack: Hello Jonathan: Hi Mack: My name is Mack, what's your name? Jonathan: My name is Billy Mack: You liar! I'm reading this post at anti-joke.com and whenever you reply, your name shows Johnathan! Johnathan: Well Mack, I guess you broke the 4th wall. By the way, this joke is over in 3, 2, 1...

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

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What did the duck say to the Pope? Quack.

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how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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two kids see a girl naked in the woods They walk away promptly to their homes and tell their mothers.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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Yo mamma so fat she has to have anti biotics to keep her alive

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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