There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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24

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bangers and mash?

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

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What came in like a wrecking ball? A wrecking ball.

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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