Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Well...here's how it went. It was a rainy Sunday evening. Seven felt like he wasn't cared for and unneeded. Two and Four tried talking to him, but that might have set him off. I just left a deli with my friend Three, and as soon as we leave, I see Seven, with a 45 to his head speeding down the alley. Causing mass commotion, he careens to the right a split second before hitting pedestrians. At the sight of that, I knew he was still in control. I call him on my smartphone and tell him to "Relax, park, and I'll meet you in a minute." I run up the side of the pickup, and lean in on the window. He pulls it down and I tell him that it isn't over, and that we DO care for him. One, Five, and Ten were run over though. Oh, and Seven ate Nine too. He was depressed when he did it.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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12 in general

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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theres a taco and a blonde...who eats who? the blonde eats the taco.

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

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Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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