Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What's worse than ten babies tied to ten trees? A: One baby tied to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's there? The KKK, got any blacks?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red violets are blue if you and your sister were hanging from a cliff i'd save your sister

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Is your refrigerator running? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a horse walks into an abandoned lighthouse , the lighthouse keeper is angered by this and ushers the horse to leave but the horse gets startled and kicks the mans bookshelf over before galloping away

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What's red, pink and spins round and round? A: A baby in a blender Q2: What's red, pink, green, and smells bad? A2: The same baby 2 weeks later

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I am a dwarf and im digging a hole... lol jokes dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops