How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the Muslim man get on a plane? Because he was going on vacation

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats brown and sticky? Doody

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

thumb_up thumb_down -4

you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Dam. Mothers Against Dyslexia.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why couldn't the mexican make a taco? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Was in a coma, survived trough smoke and mirrors, and I had 3 separated sections of my order in order to test the efficiency of my words, united we are about 6.800.000 people. Excuse my anger below, I mean I was in a coma and ended up on some hard painkillers, and while I am still tapering down on a "totally medicinally safe" dosage of 20 mg valium its a bitch, even for a guy that enjoys a mild painkiller every now and then in order to focus. Excuse my excessive typing, its paincontrol vs the stress and all 64 side effects of valium. I am alive, and my followers know that, I do not mean to brag, but Neronism tends to end up fucked up when I am gone with people trying to live up to what only I can do apparently, so I decided it was time to mash the separate groups together... Btw, we live at point zero now, if you do not know where that is, I can inform you at later time. But be quick about it if you have more questions, we only chat on horsehead due the "discussed hours"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops