Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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why is brennan hart a dumbass idk ask his mom

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What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

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A black, jew, mexican, and american are on the boat. The boat begins to sink. As an idea, they all throw stuff off the boat to try to stay afloat. The black throws off cotton, the jew throws off yamakas, and the mexican throws off sombreros. Then, the american throws off the mexican because there are too many in his country. The mexican drowns. The boat still sinks and the american goes to hell while the other go to heaven.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Josh is sooo great at blowing, xoxo Dylan Hodge.

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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why did the horse drop its ice cream Because it doesnt have thumbs so it cant hold the ice cream

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What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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A man with ADD walks into a bar. He then.......Damn Nature, you scary!

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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