GOODBYE

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Gay rights.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting thrown in to a car and raped violently.

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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This isn't funny.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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Enough with the gay jokes, they all go one direction.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops