A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

Why did the pirate have a peg leg? Diabetes

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

Why didn't the boy cross the road? Because there was traffic moving at high speed and he didn't want to be paralyzed from the waist down

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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