If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

what happened to those kids sandusky raped? who cares

What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

hmm, thinking, thinking, SNAPPLE!

Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

GOODBYE

A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

Your mom is so dirty, She smells.

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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