Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Two fish walked into a bar. They died. Because fish can't breathe out of water.

What's funny and old? I really do'nt know

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

What do you get when you mix hydrochloric acid and a humans digestive track? Death.

what did the man say to the other man? hey

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

How does a doctor wake up in the morning He opens his eyes

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

Potassium? K.

why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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