What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

What did the monkey say to the other monkey Monkey can't talk

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...