Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

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dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

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13 =B you just learned something

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-Is this the Krusty Krab? -Yes, how can I help you?

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Why did the kid jump? He didn't.

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

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Why did the man hit the little boy? His brakes failed.

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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womens rights

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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I guess calling you dear was a bit overboard for you huh? Well, just promise me you will get whatever help you need if you get ill.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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