Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because they're not free.

Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

All of these jokes suck; so I just made one that equally sucks!

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

What's big and messy? A big mess

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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