Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

An Asian with a big dick.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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