What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

Those that want what is best for me, shall listen to me and do only whatever I want. Those that want ONLY what is best for me, underestimate me greatly. You who stand in the way if my will, claiming you want what is best for me, better move aside.

your momma so fat.... that as she walked by....... i missed 3 commercials

roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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