An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What color was the black guy's skin? Brown

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Why did the Mexican steal a pack of tortillas? To feed his family. He didn't have the necessary funds to pay for it.

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The teacher asks Timmy "why is your cat at school today?" Timmy says, crying, "Because I heard my daddy say to my mommy, 'I'm going to eat that pussy when the kids leave.' so I'm saving him!"

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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what's blue , and you can urinate on it ? a rim block.

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ur gey

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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stinky boner

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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A man walks into a resteraunt and joins his friends. Then he realized he had no friends. ~YN~

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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